100 things you could live without knowing about me.

1. my middle name is anne. my confirmation name is celine. that's what happens when you let a fifth grader pick their own name.
2. when i was 13, my cat, misty died. i came home from school one day and she was lying on the kitchen floor. her back legs were wet. she didn't look sad or anything, she was still alive. i went about my business, thinking nothing was wrong. my mom came home a few hours later and immediately knew something was wrong. i didn't believe her, so i picked up misty and said, "she's fine, she can walk." i put her back down to demonstrate, and misty just fell over. turns out she had a stroke or something and her back legs stopped working. we had to put her down that night. it was her 19th birthday. while my parents were at the vet having her put down, i put a birthday candle in her dish, lit it, and sang happy birthday. i knew she wasn't coming back with my parents. that was a lot sadder than i had intended it to be. sorry.
3. i was afraid of sex for a very long time because of ecstacy.
4. my first kiss was not disappointing. i rather enjoyed it.
5. my shoe size is 8.5, but i currently have a pair of shoes that are a size 6.5, and they fit just fine.
6. my mom and i were extras in m. night shyamalan's first movie, wide awake. he shot it at my grade school in merion station, pa. if you go to the part that my mom and i are in and you put it on slow motion, you can see my mom.
7. my first concert was a hanson concert. for that, i should be shot.
8. two of my exboyfriends are now deceased. they were both heroin addicts and much older than me.
9. i have all four of my removed wisdom teeth in a bag somewhere. i was convinced that i would die if i left the oral surgeon's office without them. i was also heavily drugged at the time.
10. i hate water colors.
11. meghan is the only person in the world who knows the whole truth about my sex life. and i will never tell anyone else.
12. i didn't start drinking jagermeister until i met john.
13. i have never done acid.
14. many people think i have.
15. i was on a trolley once that ran over a woman on my way to my first yoga class.
16. i lie a lot. a lot.
17. i have a spending problem.
18. i hated my high school while i was there, but now i really, really miss it.
19. i whine too much.
20. i sneeze like a mouse.
21. sometimes i snort when i laugh. i snort a lot when i'm drunk.
22. i cannot whistle and everyone who has tried to teach me how has failed. miserably.
23. my favorite drinking game is kings. also known as circle of death.
24. i met john stamos when i went to see "cabaret" in new york with rob and maryanne.
25. i think guns are very, very sexy.
26. porn is one of my favorite things in the whole world.
27. my first boyfriend's name was alex. i was in seventh grade, he was in eighth. my best friend had a crush on him, and started leaving anonymous notes in my locker in which she threatened to hurt me if i didn't break up with him. i didn't know it was her until high school. i don't like her anymore. i'm prettier than her, anyway.
28. this is boring me.
29. green day was the first band i remember really getting into. i was in seventh grade.
30. the first book i really loved was zel by donna jo napoli. i still have it. i've read it seven times so far.
31. i've never had a nickname that i've liked. so, one day, i just started telling people that my nickname was titty, and it caught on. everyone uses it now.
32. i can beat my boyfriend at mariokart doubledash.
33. i bite my lips and my cuticles all the time.
34. i like pissing people off.
35. i'm straight, but there are a few women that i would sleep with in a second. karen o, ani difranco, kylie minogue, and nicole richie are some of those women.
36. i think penises are one of the funniest looking things in the whole world.
37. i used to smoke marlboro lights. now, i some marlboro menthol lights. mmm, fiberglass.
38. i had chicken pox when i was 3. i hid behind a cheerio box and scratched and scratched and scratched...
39. when i was 1, my mom stayed up all night making me candy for my easter basket. she made it all out of carob. the next morning, i put a piece in my mouth, chewed it for about a second, and then let it dribble out of my mouth and down my chin. i put another piece in my mouth, chewed it for a second, promptly spit it out into my hand, waddled over to my mom and put it in her hand. i didn't like it.
40. i like tofu.
41. i think white cranberries are beautiful.
42. i have a special laugh for john. i just started doing it when we started dating. i didn't do it on purpose, it just happened. i can't control it. it only comes out when he's around.
43. when i was little, i hated it when people would call me krissie. now i love it.
44. i never had an imaginary friend.
45. i think condoms are fun.
46. i'm strangely afraid of jiggly things. except jello.
47. i'm terrified of the doctor.
48. i'm phobic of deep water. seriously. five feet of it can send me into a panic attack.
49. when i was in kindergarden, we were playing tag. i chased this boy around the playground for a really long time. when i finally caught him, i pinned him up against the fence and kissed him. my hair was permed. we got married after nap time that day.
50. i hate the word panties.
51. i'm addicted to the style network.
52. i love calvin klein clothing.
53. i think pigeons are cute.
54. i have one tattoo and nine piercings.
55. my mom's middle name is anne, too.
56. i know how to say you're breaking my heart in gaelic.
57. i actually enjoy anal sex.
58. i also love doggy-style sex.
59. ...and i also like to make people uncomfortable.
60. i believe in astrology.
61. sometimes, i pretend to read people's palms to get more attention. i actually do know how to do it [well, i've studied it for quite some time], but a lot of times i make it up to give people what they want to hear.
62. i think bijou phillips is wonderful.
63. i hold my boobs when i'm lying down.
64. i am NEUROTIC about my hair.
65. i have had sex in a bathroom backstage with the drummer of a band after their show.
66. that drummer happens to be my boyfriend, but it shocked you for a second, there, right?
67. i have hooked up with a very famous metal singer after his show, though.
68. i use seven products on my hair, eight products on my face, and four products on my body every time i shower.
69. the first poem i ever fell in love with was "the mending wall" by robert frost.
70. i will never tell anyone what hairdye i use.
71. this is because i love having things that no one else does.
72. i pee alot, but i can hold it in longer than anyone else i know.
73. i hate tampons, but i have every kind on the market.
74. i'm not as cool as you think i am.
75. i am horrified at the thought that i might die alone.
76. if my boyfriend asked me to marry him right now, i would.
77. i want to live in boston.
78. i have kissed three gay men and almost every one of my girl friends.
79. i tried sushi once and almost threw up in my friend's face.
80. i was wiccan for two years. i still believe it to be a beautiful religion.
81. my boyfriend's nickname is grumpy bear.
82. i've never flashed my tits at a concert, but i desperately want to.
83. i'm a big pussy.
84. i love talking about myself.
85. all in all, i think i've started to write seven novels and never got through the first chapter of any of them.
86. i got an award in high school for surviving hardship.
87. my favorite animal is an emu.
88. my hero is my little brother, keith. he doesn't know that.
89. the saddest part of my week is when john leaves.
90. i think eccentricities feels good when you say it.
91. i would suck some serious dick for a good massage or facial.
92. i have an oral fixation.
93. every boyfriend i've ever had says i give the best head they've ever gotten.
94. and i love making people blush.
95. i have dandruff.
96. i think revenge is sweet. so sweet.
97. i like blood and scars. and i enjoyed having stitches.
98. i like sticking my hands in strange things. like bags of flour, strangers' cleavage, containers of bird seed, and mounds of acrylic paint.
99. i hate hate hate vegetables, but wish i was a vegetarian.
100. i'm so glad this is over.

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